New York City: I Made It Back Home

Did you know that New York City requires you to be extremely hydrated and possessing quad and calf muscles of steel due to all the walking? It’s true.

Side Note: Finding out that a huge blogging conference was happening the same weekend  and not getting a chance to meet some great people left me a bit sad.  Hopefully not getting to meet was just a matter of too much going on and I hope to meet some of you soon. Especially for a snuggle.

Here is a recap of major highlights .  I realize that there is probably a TON more stuff that should be on this 5 day list. But it’s a big city… cut me some slack.


Wall Street

Not at all how it’s portrayed in the movies. I pretty much think every city with downtown buildings could have “Wall Street”.


Oh the smells. And the pushiness. And the smelly pushiness. We didn’t eat anything because we thought we had enough time in the week to go back and get some food. (We didn’t get back.)  Next time, pushy Chinatown. Next time.

Little Italy

Walking down our first street in Little Italy we are greeted by the owner of this little restaurant. It was raining a bit outside and this guy, this guy did not want us in the rain any longer so he offered to pay for our “meals-a if-a we didn’t-a like it-a.”  My lasagna was full of oil and I could almost be positive that it tasted with a hint of Boy-ar-dee.  I’m not that guy who would eat lunch and then say I didn’t care for it, so I just gave them a smile and drank my one glass of water with 3 ice cubes.

Side Note: What is up with the ice-cube shortage in New York? It’s water. Frozen into ice. Water is free. Stop being stingy with the frozen water.

Grand Central Station

I instagrammed this but I now know what the term “what do you think this is, grand central station?” means. The place is pretty big. And crowded. And not what I envisioned for some reason. I don’t know why I thought there would be a lot of trains. Like inside the station. And a lot of shoe shiners. I dunno.

Manhattan Cruise

This was perfect for those that wants to see the Statue of Liberty from afar and not have to take another ride to get off and stand up close to it. It just seems like a waste. You can’t go up in the statue (not that I would have) and it just seems like, “okay, well…it’s the Statue of Liberty…..when does the boat take off again?” You can get some great pics of the islands with the Manhattan Cruise. Also, if you have an awesome fiance, you also get a crotch shot of some guy that kept getting in her camera line.

Times Square

I think it’s just what you might expect it to be. Big and bright with some crazy and desperate folk all around you. It has a small Vegas vibe with every bit of creepiness. We also walked around enough to check out the Ed Sullivan Theater, 30 Rock and a Trump building. One bit of keen advice: Do not go to New York and wear flip-flops the first day. I can’t begin to describe to you the searing pain that occurs around midnight.


NBC Store

I could have purchased a lot of things in here. But then I would be THAT guy wearing a Chuck shirt. So I just laughed at a lot of stuff and we moved on.

Greenwich Village

This was a very cool area that just seemed chill. Met a homeless man who needed some money because…well we couldn’t understand him because when he started to explain himself, he talked even softer than a whisper. All we made out was that his mom had died and he had AIDS but need some cash for something or someone. Not real sure. After Court gave him 5 bucks, he made her yell out “diva!”. Then he made me yell out “divo!” I’m not sure what that means.  Then we high-tailed it out of there as other homeless people in the park with a fountain saw the nice couple handing out 5 bucks a pop.

911 Memorial

Very powerful. A lot of pride felt. If you go to New York, you go to the Memorial.


Central Park

So Central Park is bigger than your average park. I mean, I knew it was pretty big but I never thought I wouldn’t make even make it through half of it before leaving to the next stop. It’s gorgeous. The buildings behind all the trees makes it a real special place, especially a place that’s as city as NYC.

Apple Store

So yeah, I’m a fan of the Apple. It was a must for me. I wanted to buy all the things in the store. I already have quite a number of their things but for some reason, walking down that glass cube, I wanted all the things again.

Natural History Museum

I didn’t expect to see the same place Ben Stiller was in, but for me it just didn’t come close to what I was imagining. No, I wasn’t expecting Rex to go fetch a bone. I just didn’t get a vibe that it was the same place. It felt like your normal exhibit museum. Some cool things mixed in with a lot of repetitive crap. But it’s still a place you go to in New York at least one time. And I did my one time.

Yankees Game

Not a big fan of baseball in general. I usually only watch the World Series and that’s if I’ve had a good nights sleep the night before. It’s so boring. But I will say that being AT a baseball game is way different, so the venue was pretty cool. The best part was the little teenage harem that was for Ichiro. They would scream out his name when he was up to bat and they even sounded like an anime cartoon. “EEECCCHHHARROOOAAHHH!!! Hee, hee, hee, hee!!” Hilarious. And a bit unsettling.


Tickets to the play

We headed early to Times Square to see about getting tickets to a Broadway play or musical. To get the discounted tickets, you have to stand in line. And the matinée timeframe for standing in line was 10am – 2pm. We got there around 10:15 and was greeted with a ginormous line. It moved pretty quickly and we got what we wanted, but still. Lines annoy me the most I think. There’s not even a ride at the end.

Ghost: The Musical

We decided on Ghost: The Musical based on the fact that a lot of the ones working the lines saying it was a can’t miss musical and that the special effects were amazing. I was skeptical because if you remember, Sam Wheat has to go through a door. And wouldn’t you know it, he walks right through that door. Awesome musical. Highly recommend it if you are into that kind of thing. I actually didn’t think I was until now.


We decided to walk to this place for a number of reasons. It’s supposed to be pretty funky and unique. It inspired a great rom-com of the same name. And something called frozen hot chocolate. I think we walked 90 blocks or so (probably not) only to find out that on an early Saturday evening  around 5:30pm, there is at least a 2 1/2 hour wait for 2 people. Two. We decided we would either try again the next day or save it for the next trip. We also found out that they charge 8.50 a person just to sit down and after you eat, they take off that fee from the bill. Chances are you will spend way WAY over that amount but still… just a bit pretentious for me. But I love John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale so I could overlook it when we make it back there. It will have to be on the next trip though.

Empire State Building

One thing you should know: I hate heights. Planes are better because for the most part, I can’t see the ground. You can definitely see the ground from just around 1300 feet. It’s not good for me to be that high and still see people walking on the ground. The floor below me on the 86th floor felt spongy and soft. I really thought the building wasn’t built correctly because it felt like it was tilted. There are way too many people up there at the same time holding their cameras over the edge taking pictures…without STRAPS!!! Small panic attack began and I clung to the side of the wall like I was hiding from one of those spotlight things looking for escaped prisoners. But I did it for her and that made my weak knees and sweaty palms worth it.


Metropolitan Museum of Art

I could almost take what I said about the Natural Museum of Art and stick it here for the MET. A lot repetitive stuff with some cool things thrown in. A place I’m glad I took some time and went to but unless there is an exhibit that I’m really stoked about, probably my last visit. Meh.


We flew in and were flying out of New Jersey so we decided that we would take our time and slowly make it over to the airport. We had 3 or 4 air-trains, subway cars, transit boxes, to take to get back to Newark. Our plane didn’t leave until 9:11pm (yeah, they really had a plane leaving at that time) but we could have shown up at midnight and still had been fine. They blamed it on the weather but something about a lady passed through security with a residue on her hands and something about a bag with bomb substance in it. Then security lost the bag. So there weren’t any planes going out for United until the bag was found. Good thing it rained that night or they couldn’t have blamed it on the “weather”.

Long story short and through in a handful of street hot dogs, it was a great trip to New York. It was kind of exactly what I pictured and imagined in my mind. Lots of people, lots of smells and lots to do. Now if they could cut the people and smells in half, it just might be okay to move there. Just kidding. Sort of.

Also?  I love this girl.


10 thoughts on “New York City: I Made It Back Home

  1. I nearly puked right there looking at the picture for the Empire State Building. I’ve been up the CN Tower a couple times and let me tell you, fuck heights.

  2. Holy crap you did a lot. I’ve been to NYC five or six times for work and am actually going next weekend again (for work.) If it wasn’t something I could expense, there is NO way I could afford it and I still haven’t seen 1/10 th of what you guys did. So cool for you!

    I stay right in Times Square and walk everywhere when I get an hour or two not working at night. The first time I went I didn’t even know I had walked by the Empire State Building or the Naked Cowboy until I told someone there was a dude in a cowboy hat wearing a banana hammock playing a guitar and I walked by some real big tall buildings.

    Needless to say, I’ve had a better itinerary since that trip, but I would LOVE to go to a Yankees game (even though they just beat my Tigers) or the memorial. In other words, I’m stowing away in your bag next trip.

  3. Crap. Now I have to go to New York right now. I also need to need to get some pre-teens to yell “EEECCCHHHARROOOAAHHH” at me during my daily activities. It’s okay that that’s not my name; it’s the sentiment that matters.

    • It was the best part of the game. They were so ecstatic. They also all bought Ichiro jersey shirts and all got hot dogs and Pepsi’s. Welcome to America.

  4. Oh man, fuck that trip up the Empire State Building, I have NO head for heights. That’s love for you, Mr Jerrod – you’re a better man than me (not that I’m a man).

  5. Wow, that was a very full trip! I’ve been to New York a bunch of times and haven’t done half the stuff you crammed into one vacation. Also, the first time I went to see a Broadway show in NYC, I wore heels. HEELS! I never made the same mistake again.

    • I can’t begin to count just how many women were walking around in heels! I guess you must be a local to get use to that sort of thing.
      And yes, tons to still do there.

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